The Beauty of Brokenness

While kneeling before cross & candle at a Taize service, I heard the voice of the Eternal.

“This candlelight is beautiful & holy. But if you could see the people around you with My eyes, you would see such a blessed brightness that you could scarcely bear it through squinted eyes.”

Then I saw a vision of beams of light shining brightly from each person in their broken places, intersecting & colliding with beams from others, dashing off at odd angles & creating beautiful patterns of light in the air & glorious prisms of color at each intersection. I viewed flash after flash of rainbow light, and I was blinded by the glory of those loving & loved faces gathered there.

It occurred to me that I had no idea what pain and hurt must exist in that room, to create such beauty.

The Gift of Matter

A few years ago, I sat in St. Mary’s Cathedral in Mount Angel, enjoying a choir concert. My son was in the choir, and as the men took a solo section, I could hear his voice, sounding faintly like his father's. I wished my late husband was there to listen. Then it occurred to me that all the departed saints and all the hosts of heaven could very well fit into the vaulted ceiling of the sanctuary, because they were energy, not matter. Perhaps he was there, after all.

And it struck me what a great gift matter is. Spirit beings stand in awe of us because we are matter. We can experience things they cannot. All the angel choirs of heaven cannot produce the sound of a human voice raised in song.

I think that it was not easy for the Eternal to produce matter. Even for an omnipotent Being, this was a Herculean task. But into this effort, the Eternal poured her love – the love of creatures, her children.

And so, our very matter is a gift, a joy, a blessing. Even in our pain, even in our sorrow and our dying, the gift of matter is an awesome one. We sometimes wander this earth feeling clumsy and awkward in our flesh wrapping, but it is a miracle and a blessing. To feel, to see, to smell, to taste and sense with our fleshly bodies is a unique and holy gift.